The Internet Is My Only News Source These Days

So stop me if you've heard this:

The United States has discovered nearly $1 trillion in untapped mineral deposits in Afghanistan, far beyond any previously known reserves and enough to fundamentally alter the Afghan economy and perhaps the Afghan war itself, according to senior American government officials.

Or this:

Apparently, according to historian, Douglas Brinkley there is a huge federal gulf recovery act being planned by the Obama administration and by Congress that would be on the scale of Tennessee Valley Authority.